SoulShots
by Panda-Angel-Wings
Summary: "Want to meet your long lost brother?" Brother? Ichigo turned away from his manga as he looked at his dad with a conflicting expression. "Fine, fine." Isshin turned towards the opening door. "You can come in now Ulquiorra." -a drabble series. Updated frequently weekly. Requests accepted!
1. My Brother?

**•Life in Karakura Arc•**

**1**

"Yo, Ichigo."

"What do you want Oyaji?"

"Want to meet your long lost brother?"

Brother? Ichigo turned away from his manga as he looked at his dad with a conflicting expression.

"Fine, fine." Isshin turned towards the opening door. "You can come in now Ulquiorra."


	2. Can we? Can we Ichigo?

**•Life In Karakura Arc•**

**2**

Ichigo gripped the wall for support.

"WHAT?" Ichigo stared at the tall pale, humanoid monster. His supposed green eyed brother stared back at him, with a bored expression on his face.

Isshin stared back and forth between the two. "Well? How do you like him? Can we keep him?"

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**Sorry! I forgot to add, that this story is literally a short drabble series! In fact, the only reason Laiba and I are doing this is because while we're working a big project, we shouldn't just not update stories! So whenever we have time, we'll just randomly put a story here. Got it? :D Good!**

**Ichigo: I still don't get why Ulquiorra is related to me.**

**Isshin: Well, like I said, he IS your lond lost brother, son.**

**Ichigo: Shut the ********************

**Isshin: No! I don't recall teaching you those words! **

**Ichigo: You never did, Dad. Whatever just read and review people. Or Sabby here'll kill you all.**

**Me: :D He's right, folks! SO REVIEW! It makes me happy!**

**~Sabby**


	3. Keeping Him

**•Life in Karakura Arc•**

**3**

Ichigo glared back at his father. "KEEP HIM? WHAT, DID YOU JUST PICK HIM OFF THE STREET?"

Isshin stared at his shoes. "I'd never do anything like THAT."

Ichigo sighed in relief. "Well thats-"

"But Urahara-san DID mention finding him after Aizen got imprisoned."


	4. Heartless

**• Life in Karakura Arc•**

**4**

"-amazing. WHAT?!" Ichigo glanced back at the former Espada, who was now flipping through one of Ichigo's school books.

"Yes. Shame on you for not killing him hard enough. No hard feelings, right Ulquiorra-bo?"

Ulquiorra looked back at the former Shinigami with emotionless eyes. "Kurosaki-san took me in when no one else did. I have let go of my Arrancar ways and am now a human working to become a future Shinigami."

"WHY DIDN'T YOU LET MAYURI DO EXPERIMENTS-"

Isshin silenced his idiot son with a look. "I'm heartless but not THAT heartless. Besides, Ulqiourra is a good replacement to that puppy the neighbor killed the other day."


	5. Nekos

**This has nothing to do with the Ulquiorra story. In fact, I'll probably continue that later. Here's another one:**

**•Life in Karakura Arc•**

**5**

Byakuya looked at the outfit Rukia was wearing.

"You are not allowed to go out."

Rukia's eyebrow twitched. "WHAT? Why?"

"You are wearing foreign clothing. Besides, what is that?" Byakuya asked mortified.

"Oh, this?" She looked down at her slippers. "I think they are called Konichiwa Neko."

Byakuya fumed with anger. "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?"

Rukia flinched under his gaze. "I said Konichiwa Neko."

"HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A HELLO KITTY!"

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**;3 Review! **

**~Sabbeh**


	6. Unfortunately, She Forced Him Along

**A take on our dear Boy with Old Man's Hair...(if you don't get it check out "Boy with Old Man's Hair")**

* * *

**•Life in Karakura•**

**6**

Matsumoto stole a look at a reluctant looking Hitsugaya glare at the sign.

"Why am I even here?" he grumbled under his breath.

Matsumoto just grinned and pulled along the white haired boy.

"Two tickets into the zoo!" she told the man selling tickets. She noticed him droll over her, but she ignored it and just pulled onto her taichou to come closer to her.

"Are you taking your son to meet animals today? There's a great exhibition—"

Suddenly, the atmosphere dropped a few degrees. "Son? Do I look any bit related to this inferior—"

"My, my, he's at the rebellious stage isn't he? Well, young man, here's a lollipop."

* * *

**Review, my dear pandas! **

**Love and Fried Pandas****, **

**Sabby le Panda Eater~ (I dunno where Angel Wings is...I think Laibas sleeping)**


	7. Shopping is BAD Now

**•Life in Karakura Arc•**

**7**

Rukia knew that she shouldn't have come.

Matsumoto had just arrived in Karakura Town, and demanded her help with some "important thing."

Rukia, being the goodhearted person she is, offered her assistance. She nothing to do after all. But then, she realized what the fuku-taichou wanted.

"Rukia, dear, you look so amazing in that!" Matsumoto smiled. A large amount of bags from other stores were piled around her feet. Rukia shivered at the exposure of her skin. That was odd. What WAS this thing? She looked at the mirror and gasped.

Matsumoto had made her wear a black and white strapless cocktail dress that seemed to be glued to her body showing off every angle. Rukia blushed. This was not something she could walk out with.

"Well, thank god you came here with me, Rukia!" Matsumoto hopped over to her smaller companian. "My boring Taichou doesn't understand these things! He's to annoying and mean!"

The store's atmosphere seemed to darken. "Matsumoto..." Rangiku's back straightened and a look of horror was on her face.

"T-t-taichou. How did you- OMG YOU LOOK SO CUTE!" Matsumoto had turned to look at her younger Captain Hitsugaya, who she was currently suffocating with her death hugs. Rukia tilted her head to see him wearing a casual hoodie and jeans paired with converse. Still, it was a change from his regular Shinigami clothes.

"Wfft ar-" no matter what he did, he couldn't let go.

"Ho ho ho," Matsumoto laughed, crushing the white haired boy in her arms.

And so Rukia continued to watch them, wondering when she'll be able to get rid of this embarrassing outfit.

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**OH MEH GODZ! **

**800+ Views? Your spoiling me! Thanks for all the reads! ;3 I feel like I accomplished something great...as usual, if you have time, please review! Even a simple "Good!" or "That sucks!" is okay ;D flame me all you want if you have problems. I love flames. **

**Love and Grilled Pandas,**

**Sabrina the Panda Warrior :O**


	8. Her Reaction

**Eid Mubarak! Many people are celebrating Eid al Adha today. Some are doing it tomorrow, but I'll take the time and wish all of you happy Eid!**

**A reader requested it. Being the good person I am, I complied with it! Sorry though...its more serious and longer and I tried my best with it. I suck at romance :/**

**•Life in Soul Society Arc•**

**8**

Byakuya looked at his sister, who was trying not to laugh.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

Rukia tried to look as impassive as Nii-sama does, but could not stifle her laugh. "Yachiru-san did some very bad things, ne?" Rukia surveyed the wall. "Who knew she made something that suited your tastes, nii-sama?"

Byakuya turned to look the other way around. Thinking she had done something wrong, Rukia looked down with a frown. "_Gomme ne_, nii-sama." She had never done anything to get his recognition. After her almost-execution, he has been more linent on her. But that didn't change the fact that she was still the lonely memory of his late wife.

Turning her head bowed in shame, she proceeed to walk away from the older Shinigami.

"Wait."

He held onto her tiny wrist, so much smaller in his larger hand. Rukia stopped in alarm and looked at the head of her adopted house in surprise. "Nii...sama...?"

Byakuya cleared his throat, feeling even more guilty from the bewilderment in her trembling voice. Had he always been so strict with her she though it was unbelievable for him to even touch her? Her amethyst eyes looked deep into his obsidian ones, asking the forbidden question: _Why?_

Releasing her wrist from his gentle but firm hold, Byakuya stepped back lightly to look at his wife's doppelganger closely.

"Tonight, the noble house Nakamura are hosting a flower viewing for all the noble families. I was not originally planning to go, but if you aren't busy, you can accompany me," he said with his best poker face on. The last thing he wanted was for her to see his clammy hands and nervousness-something only Hisana had done to him previously.

Rukia was appalled. Her nii-sama _wanted_ her to come along? But she didn't have anything ready, no clothes, no readily accessible accessories, no-

"I will supply you with everything you need." Byakuya replied to her thoughts, even _more _nervous than he was before. "Use anything you need, _Rukia_."

Hearing her name voiced out by his cool voice made her giddy with excitement. "_Arigatou gozaimasu,_ nii-sama." She bowed her head towards him. She looked into his eyes with happiness about to brim over. "I shall take my leave now."

Turning, Byakuya tried to tear his eyes off of her petite figure walking away from him.

No. He had to stop himself. he had more, albeit less-important, things to do.

Sighing he looked at the colorful wall. For one thing, he had to get rid of the enormous mural of all the Gotei 13 taichous and fukutaichous getting wasted at a party in Chappy and Wakame form. Although the Wakame version of him was quite handsome on the wall, he knew the elders would disapprove of it.

* * *

**Was it good? I tried my best. Although ByaRuki isn't one of my favorites, I liked writing out of my comfort zone! I might make a sequel to this, if I get some review *0* BTW if you guys request anything, I'll probably do it. ;D **

**Love and Panda Tikka Masala, **

**Sabby ze Panda Chef**


	9. Unicorn Horns

**Just a little scene that popped in my head in class. **

**•Life in Karakura Arc•**

**9**

"Ulquiorra-sama?"

The green eyed Espada turned to look at the ridiculous blue haired Espada before him.

"What do you want, peasant?"

The blue haired one flashed Ulqiorra a dangerous smile, and batted his eye lashes on him. "I wanted to know if this dress looked nice. I might buy it."

Ulquiorra glanced at his companion who wore a black halter top minidress and stilletos. He even had single bow on the side of his blue hair. "By all means, use all your money to buy it! I never even wanted to babysit you in the first place! And what's the fact girlish accent? Just because you think leading yourself onto other _males_ is a good way to get someone to do something that'll benefit you isn't how the world works you know. I don;t understand why more and more men have the urge to become more like Charlotte Chuhlhourne."

Grimmjow pouted. "Since you had no reaction with that stupid Hime, how the hell do I get you to buy the-"

"No. I shall not consent to buy you the copyrights from Tite Kubo."

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Grimmjow hollered getting attention from everyone in the store. His cocktail dress hitched up embarassingly on his hairy thighs from all the reiatsu exploding from him. "I DO ALL THIS JUST SO YOU CAN MAKE AIZEN FIX MY UNICORN HORN!"

...

"What?"

"Sorry sorry, that sounded wrong."

"...I don't want to know but I'm now intrigued to learn what your anatomy is like. Should I refer you to Szayelapparo? He may help you with your...predicament." He rarely smirked

_"Kishire, Panthera."_

* * *

**What did ya think? I think it was pretty decent...I always wanted to know what would happen if Grimmkitty ever wore a dress and tried to woo our emo Ulquiorra. Well, now I know. And you know too. **

**Eh, I tried. Review ;3 And if you have any requests, just PM or review them here. The next day it'll probably be the thing I update. **

**Love and Crystallized Pandas,**

**Sabby-sama the Panda Warrior**


	10. Hearing Certain Things

**WARNING: It's not explicit. I'm telling you this NOW. Just warning you. **

**•Life in Soul Society Arc•**

**10**

"EAT IT!"

"Aww...why do I have to?"

"Because it taste amazing!"

"I don't want to taste Inoue's...uh...awkward concoctions."

Ichigo and Renji continued to press their ears to the door, wanting to hear more and more. What was Rukia, Matsumoto and Orihime up to?

"Rukia-chan~" Matsumoto slurred. "Are you sure you don;t wanna bite? It doesn;t hurt you know."

Renji heard Rukia scream. "NO! I WILL NOT DO...SUCH THINGS TO MYSELF!"

Ichigo's eyes grew wide. "Are they...?"

Renji looked at him with equal confusion. "I dunno should we..."

Inside, they heard Matsumoto do a cross between a moan and a scream. "Byakuya...~"

Renji instantly threw up the rolls he had eaten the hour before. _Kuchiki-taichou_ was there too? What was he doing there?_  
_

"Stop making so much noise woman. If I had thought you'd be this noisy I wouldn't have let you join Rukia and Inoue," came Byakuya's deep voice. Ichigo feigned throwing up, wondering what was going on in there.

After a few more awkward noises, resrting Rukia to scream loud and long, Renji couldn't take it anymore. "I'm going in."

With a flash, he kicked open the 6th Barrack Captain's Door to see...

Ichigo groaned. "Holy..."

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**What did Ichigo see? :D I'm evil aren't I? And I already said its not explicit so...what do you think? I'm gonna be evil and update the story next Tuesday...**

**BTW what do you think of Radiohead? I LOVE Radiohead. It was weird though, to find out Idiotique was Ishida's theme. Because then I was like, "OMG I NEED TO DOWNLOAD EVERY VERSION OF THIS AND CALL IT 'ISHIDAS THEME'" and I ended up just downloading one. **

**Whatever.**

**Love and Panda Slurpees,**

**Sabby-sama the Panda Warrior**


	11. Hearing Certain Things Part 2

**I lied. I updated a day early than promised ;D because my friend, who was reading this story, nearly strangled me for not telling her what's next. . Damn you Ms. Spica. But its for you ;D**

**•Life in Soul Society•**

**11**

Ichigo groaned. "Holy..."

He had no idea what to say.

Byakuya was kneeling on the ground, holding onto Matsumoto's hair. Matsumoto was in mid-moan...and Rukia was sprawled on the ground with her face in the expensive Persinan rug and Orhime was sitting on the opposite side of the room giggling.

Byakuya's eyes widened. "Renji...Kurosaki..." Shunpoing, he tossed the two men onto the couch and threatened to kill them if they ever real what they saw.

"Byakuya..." Ichigo coughed. "But...what _did_ we see? Is it true that you only adopted Rukia because-"

_Slap! _Blood sputtered out of the ranga's mouth from the hit he had gotten from the older man. "You peasants will not even be able to comprehend what I say with those idiotic heads of yours. In fact, I don't even know why I'm even explaining to you all of this in the first place." Byakuya ran a hand through his hair and walked to the highly furnished armchair. "Where do I begin..."

"Nii-sama," Rukia said in a perky voice, having been relieved from the rug. "Why don't you tell them what you were doing with Orihime alone in the room? Orihime said you guys had an 'adventure.'"

Byakuya smiled. Ichigo had a stroke. Renji knew something had happened, and he was not prepared for his Captain's next words.

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**LOL! What do YOU think Byakuya will tell? What was their "journey?" :D I'm a very evil person. I'll let you wait a while...**

**Love and Panda Twinkies, **

**Sabby-sama the Panda Warrior**


	12. Hearing Certain Things Part 3

**Gomenasai! **

**I apologize for not updating in 2 weeks! I was busy with High School Applications, entrance exams, auditions, and now I have a Regents class 4 days a week after school. And the semester ended too -.- Unfortunately, I've been busy. **

**I hope this chapter makes it up to you! Although I *highly* doubt it. For one thing...well, I'll let you read it. I felt evil while I wrote this. MWAHAHAHA.**

* * *

**•Life in Soul Society•**

**12**

Byakuya smiled. Ichigo had a stroke. Renji was knew something had happened, but was not prepared for his Captain's next words.

"Inoue-san allowed me to use her."

Ichigo, who had stopped writhing in pain, got up and looked at the taller Shinigami with a fire in his eyes. "_Used _her? What the hell did you do, Byakuya?"_  
_

Orihime giggled. "It was so much fun. He's much better than Ulquiorra was."

Renji's eyes boggled. "What does _Ulquiorra_ have to do with this?" Ichigo glanced at his buddy in horror, trying to NOT interpret what was being said. Rukia though, got up and knocked Ichigo on the head.

"Temee! You should be honored a friend of yours was with Nii-sama!"

"With? In what way?" Renji furiously asked. He had always thought that his Taichou was not appealed to anything like _that _but now he didn't know what to think...

"Renji." Byakuya said, his usual grim line on his face now returned. Renji flinched under his gaze, while ichigo still stood in a daze muttering, "_Using...her..."_

Renji gulped. "Hai, taichou...?"

"Get me the flower catalog. Inoue-san and I have a lot to discuss."

Ichigo looked up in surprise. "Flower catalog? What does that have to do with anything?"

Matsumoto giggled. "That's the best part, Ichigo-kun. It was what was _done_ with them, the interesting part, right Kuchiki-taichou~?"

Byakuya smiled again. "That is indeed the best part of the _experience_." Ichigo had a heart attack. Renji's jaw dropped at the interpretation.

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**:P CLIFFY! Sorry, Ms. Spica. You can reprimand me and kill me about leaving yet another cliffhanger later. In fact, I'm looking forward to your assault on me during the weekend! And for all my other readers, well, don't hate me, but its just so much FUN watching all you people be like, "Damn. She trolled me. AGAIN!" So in a way I have mimicked Tite Kubo's trollness and incorporated it in my writing . Don't kill me. **

**But you could kill me with reviews...;D**

**OKAI! Here's the deal- everyone who reviews gets a...*wait for it* PANDA! I will distribute them ut in the next chapter! And if you want it to look a certain way, I'll do that too. **

** Love and Panda Cupcakes,**

**Sabby le Panda Empress**


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